Adventures in the English Language

The Queen and I, like most people, enjoy a bit of ice cream now and again. "Premium" ice cream to be precise. Our guilty pleasure of choice used to be Ben & Jerry's until they sold out. Now we have a particular fondness for the Marble Slab Creamery chain of franchise ice cream stores. We don't go there very often because it's expensive and not terribly healthy as a regular thing, but it's tasty nonetheless. Besides, there are very few places I can find cinnamon ice cream which is a personal favorite. 

Now, why should you care about our personal choice of frozen treat vendors?

I shall endeavor to tell you. 

The Queen, an otherwise intelligent and educated woman who learned German the hard way, occasionally has what we will politely call "English as a Second Language" (ESL) moments or "adventures in interesting pronunciation or syntax." I think it is because she has a tendency to think in German while trying to speak in English, but that's just a guess on my part. 

For instance, once upon a time many years ago now, we were driving along the highway when she spotted a billboard advertising our favorite ice cream shop. The self same business I mentioned at the beginning.

The Queen says, "Hey, look! Marble Cream Slabbery!"

Me: "...." [blink, blink] "Say that again?"

The Queen patiently (she's a saint that way) says, "Marble Cream Slabbery."  

I, barrelling down the highway at 70 something miles an hour, gave her the side long glance which clues her in to think about what she's saying.

The Queen, whose inner light bulb is flashing like it's disco night at Studio 54, says "Wha...? Ohhhhh...." 

Giggle....snort, laugh, laugh, laugh. 

To this day, she has a mental block preventing her from saying "Marble Slab Creamery." 

But, wait, it gets better. 

She's now adding variations on the theme. 

As we headed to Galveston last night, The Queen brought up the subject of getting dessert, "Hey, maybe we can get some Marble Sleam Clabbery."

Me: "Sleam Clabbery???"

M&M: "No sleam."

The Queen: "Oh no."

Me: "How about some sleamed clabs for dinner?"

Things went downhill from there when we started trying to get her to pronounce "Worcestershire" as well. It was good for a solid 30 minutes of laughter which we both needed after not enough sleep.